Hannah at Christianlife429 has requested a post about dating/courtship!
Now when it comes to dating and courtship there is a difference.
1) An engagement to go out socially with another person, often out of romantic interest.
2) One’s companion on such an outing.
going out with the guy/girl that you are going to marry with alot of people.
Lets look at some things that go on in both:
Dating: You may be dating a person that you really love and would do anything for him/her! Your feelings may get in the way of your thinking!
Courtship: Although it takes more than feelings to sustain a relationship, love is still a key ingredient to the success of a Christian courtship. Without true love a relationship simply will not work because love is what motivates you to keep making an effort even when things aren’t going well.
Dating: When you get hurt by the person that you love then you may just stop dating because you can’t forgive them!
Courtship: regardless of how much you both love eachother the key thing is not to hold eachother in unforgiveness by holding eachother ransom to past mistakes. Your relationship simply will not grow if you keep holding on to how your partner hurt you in the past and keep bringing up their mistake every time there is a disagreement. Unforgiveness will give birth to bitterness, assumptions, suspicion, and lack of trust none of which are healthy for a courtship.
Dating: Girls sometimes you may see your guy with other girl or guys you may see your girl with some other guy. Now you may get jealse and that might couse a great argument and then a brack up!
Courtship: Every true Christian courtship must have trust as part of the foundation. Lack of trust gives birth to suspicion which will lead you to begin to question everything your partner does, you start checking their phone and monitoring their every move which will become very frustrating and annoying for them.
Dating: If you don’t understand what you both want then it may get bad. You may have sex or something may happen that you don’t want to happen!
Courtship: One of the key problems Christian couples that are courting have is in the area of really understanding eachother, and to be honest with you, this is something that you will probably be working on for the rest of your lives even after marriage.
Dating: You may not be communicating in the best way! You may not have those talks that needed to be talked out!
Courtship: You have to be able to express yourself and communicate the way you feel and be honest about things with eachother. Without communication there will be a lot of assumptions, don’t expect your partner to know what’s on your mind if you don’t tell them.
Dating: If you don’t have boundaries then you may have sex before you want to! You need to set boundaries before you start dating.
Courtship: Every true Christian courtship must have boundaries as part of its foundation. Not everything goes. If you want to protect yourself from guilt and regrets and feeling condemned when you enter the presence of God then you must have boundaries in your relationship.
Here are some other things that you might want to know!
1) Take time through prayer to discern God’s will for the new family you are about to start.
2) Base your courtship in the family. Family member must be involved. As much as possible, spend time with each other’s families. You need them in the marriage.
3) Emotional Intimacy; Guard your heart and do not allow your emotions to drive you to sin during your courtship. Give yourself time to know each other.
4) Physical Intimacy; Mutually decide what your limits would be. Write them down and make them clear from day one.
5) Save the first kiss; save the first kiss till after you have said. “I do”. Kissing can ignite romance and could mean danger.
6) Resolve with your courting partner never to give in to sin.
7) Don’t give rise to scandal. Don’t give people a reason to suspect you are having a sexual relationship with your spouse-to-be, even though you might not.
8) Be accountable; Make a list together of resolutions and guidelines for your courtship so you can use it to watch your actions.
9) Be active in your local assembly. Together, participate in church activities. This would help you understand how your partner behaves in a group.
Now here are some scriptures on this subject:
Also it is not good for a soul to be without knowledge, And he sins who hastens with his feet. (NKJV)
He who finds a wife finds a good thing, And obtains favor from the LORD. (NKJV)
If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask of GOD, who gives to all liberally and without reproach, and it will be given to him. (NKJV)
1 Timothy 4:12
Let no one despise your youth, but be an example to the believers in word, in conduct, in love, in spirit, in faith, in purity. (NKJV)
1 Corinthians 10:31
Therefore, whether you eat or drink, or whatever you do, do all to the glory of GOD. (NKJV)
Without counsel, plans go awry, But in the multitude of counselors they are established. (NKJV)
Be kindly affectionate to one another with brotherly love, in honor giving preference to one another. (NKJV)
1 Peter 4:8
And above all things have fervent love for one another, for “love will cover a multitude of sins. (NKJV)
Whoever walks blamelessly will be saved, But he who is perverse in his ways will suddenly fall. (NKJV)
Keep your heart with all diligence, For out of it spring the issues of life. (NKJV)
Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. (NKJV)
If you would like make a suggestion on a life issue for next week then please leave a comment below and I’ll get it. If you are going through a life issue and have question about it, want to know more about it, or would like to know what GOD says about it then please leave a comment below and I’ll post about it! If you would like to be anonymous then that is okay. If you would like me not to post your comment for other people to read then please say so then the comment and I will NOT post it! See you next week(LORD willing)!